I’m getting ready for a date. I have carefully chosen the most flattering clothing, as all women do. I have carefully applied makeup, arranged my hair, and step back to look in the mirror. Just by virtue of the fact that I am a woman, there is a good chance I will not like what I see. Because no matter who you are, our culture makes you insecure about what you see. And if you are a plus-size woman, you receive even more negative messages than the average woman.
I use the word “average” but, in fact, plus-size women ARE the average now. Society is only now starting to give us some much needed validation.
I love Sarah Millican. She’s my favorite comedian. Not only is she hilariously funny, but in a recent show she told the audience, “I’m fatter than I’ve ever been, and I couldn’t give less of a shit.” I love you Sarah, you’re my hero.
If you are considering asking a plus-size woman out on a date, well, why would you want to when there are so many “normal” women available? A plus-size woman, by virtue of her situation, is an incredibly confident woman. And isn’t confidence attractive? She has to be confident. No one else is validating her, so she has to do it herself. She knows her worth, and she doesn’t need you. So the fact that she WANTS you is a compliment to you.
She is probably an extremely intelligent person. She’s developed her mind because all her life she’s been told, “you don’t have much of a body, so you better develop your brain.” And she has, not to prove anything to you, but because she was smart to begin with, and she knows it.
She is more than likely an extremely empathetic person, due mostly to the indignities she’s had to endure. She knows what it’s like to be disregarded, overlooked, and ignored. She knows what it’s like to be thought of as less than human, and she doesn’t want you to ever have to feel that way.
Yet no one ever recognizes her BEAUTY. Yes, the round fullness of her voluptuous curves is beautiful. The softness of her huggable body is a joy. The depth of her emotion is unfathomable. She quivers with delight as you touch her, as you make clear to her that you love to touch her.
Yes, we are confident, intelligent, and empathetic. But we have a beauty all our own, if you take the time to experience it.
If not, well, frankly, we won’t give you a second thought. Believe it or not, for every one of you who disregards us, there are three who will not. Yes ladies, your confidence and exuberance for life are like a magnet. And the potential partners of truly superior quality will be drawn to you.
So if you are one of those who says “No thank you,” you’ve proved my point. By choosing to pass up a truly incredible woman, you have showed your unworthiness, and made plain your lack of superior quality. We’re not crying over you. We feel sorry for you, but we’re not losing any sleep over you.
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